Re-Discovering the HIV Fight...

Re-Discovering the HIV Fight or Re-Creating Stigmatization – Job lines again?

Sam Mwaka-karama

Puppet on the string starts another stroke: jumping this side and then that side - HIV/Aids – is historically known to have started somewhere around mid to late 1970s. In between a period of about five years 1975 to 1979 is the gray area internationally known and have been established by WHO and other Global health concern entities; as the period the disease initially materialized.

In the early days of people generally discussing HIV verbally or in writing – which began more seriously around the [1988-1991s] – the concept of what people now loosely talk of as [HIV Fight] was also established in this secondary period. I personally made my written contribution in discussing HIV in my own publication of a personal ‘Newsletter’ in 1991. My maiden publication [MONAKK] printed by Uganda Co-operative Alliance UCA on Nkrumah Road circulated in Kampala, Jinja and my home town Gulu, was also the initial point of my entry into writing and publishing material that could be internationally read and digested. Basically HIV/Aids was at that time a darkness unknown ambiguity globally.

After this initial period of people widely and publicly talking about and discussing HIV/Aids; something that in Uganda here was limited to then very scanty press and media and wide-eyed café, restaurants, bars and beer hall scares – actually to think backwards a little; it was a most difficult time for anybody who cared to think at all… because at the top of the world’s most advanced health ‘Think Tanks’ so many abstracts were devised, crafted then advanced, modeled and re-modeled, then juggled about in Journals, magazines and academic publications and forums; abstract theories that practically scared people virtually to the very death…

Compounded by a terrorizing tabloids horde of weird shifting and sieving wild analyses and, scrap definitions of compound laboratory genetic findings: mostly ambiguous stuffs like “human Carriers” of the molecular HIV [x or y chromosomes] genes… that once fused with certain other blood types [in sex] instantly sparked [full blown] cureless HIV/Aids!

The academics abroad in their disease anthropology - researched some colonial time disease called; “Brucellosis” which quickly zeroed the suspicions on a spot inside Uganda close to the Tanzanian border – where colonial health officer Bruce ones carried out his research among roadside communities… and the disease defined by Bruce way back in the 1950s was apparently of similar identifiable symptoms and general characteristics as that of HIV/Aids.

The world of the academia can be very brutal and merciless or insensitive – as the world of the media is cramped with daring, hard and terribly malicious minds as well. Between those two important worlds of ethics, back then, fragile emotions [among early day’s victims] were crushed! Falling infected people thronged about swayed by the winds of wheeler-dealer and brave-minds that capitalized on the ambiguity of HIV/Aids prevalence; Thus creating [stigmatization] and, soft hearted people began to accept publicly that they were HIV sufferers – with this concept of stigmatization the acronym [HIV Fight] came to existence. Very quickly things boiled down to bare ‘escape goat’ stigma thinking… which gave birth to the enormous blame syndrome; someone else less known, but of notoriety of some kind was always the blame victim.

To us Africans ‘blame syndrome’ is a natural to most of our cultures – feuding family against family, clan against clan, tribe against tribe, competing individuals against one another – actually it all started with the focal-point area of the disease Brucellosis findings in Rakai district.

The silent stigma fight saw many people blaming each-other to death causing many others to flee… then the scenario painters in the press brought in the concept that ‘Transit truckers’ were initially the ones that infected the area; now that brought to attention ‘trucking Somali drivers’ and the beginning of the metamorphoses of the stigmatization phenomenon. Its wild bush-fire burning effect spread country-wide - from Bruce’s focal point Rakai.

My Newsletter articles; one of the earliest really objective observation of the HIV/Aids problem and positively encouraging layman view became the fundamental material that fed clearer thinking among victims and concerned local thinkers, writers and discussants; some form of analysis that cleared hearts and minds clogged by abstract academic publications and distressing tabloids and other genre mainstream media views – I got encouraging feed-back that time – I recall funders were suddenly running around with cash in hand putting together Journalists to found some new robust newspapers… I wasn’t a trained Journalist so I was unknown; so that my inspiring newsletter folded as suddenly in Gulu; I found myself a HIV Stigma! I am not from ‘Bruce’s Rakai’, nor was I more importantly one of the early victims – but I became “suspect” – to this day now about or nearly thirty years down the road I am still not HIV positive. Though back then it became very difficult for me to do anything at all… I was caught-up in a vice that has now lasted 27 years; lost two daughters in Germany and a son in California. Branded that I was the infector of all the victims – to this day I am not living on ARV.

Stigmatization then and Stigmatization now    

Philosophically a fight is two sided: on one side you and on the other side the enemy – actually in this sort of ‘vice’ situation [the enemy] is not necessarily your enemy nor are you necessarily his enemy either – he is just some Guy whose character [and or tribe or race] you often didn’t just like; he is dangled there with the ambiguous [escape goat] accusations as ‘the enemy’ and, so what! It serves the purpose; the fight begins, like it did between 1988/1991.

And like in the [cock or bull] fights those who stake them out benefit on bets and collections from those who are entertained, stake holders and gamblers on whoever wins the [HIV/Aids Fight]. In the rough and tangle that embodied the three or four year fight: the Berlin wall came down! Northern Uganda bled! Wall materialized between Israel and Palestine! Twin Towers came down! The Black Hawk came down! Bosnia was aflame! South Sudan broke free! Rwanda bled! DR Congo and other parts of the African continent ‘saw red’! Iraq was a-storm – And things now evidently are getting better though the under-belly of the world still rumbles; the rhetoric, claims, talks, dialogues and discussions even accusations still goes on…

What I believe is the fertilizers of renewed local political problems are those political fall-outs among allies of the [HIV Aids fights] being the ones who will publish the real [beans] smear books someday… former allies who irrationally become enemies are the ‘squealers’; the ‘turn-coats’ who leave and then double-back are the 4’ 2” Gnomes still clinging to the [old] vain, useless stigmatization because obviously they didn’t even have the innovations to even find some scrap ‘reformative themes…’ and go back to try and eat-up the stinking hair of some Rasta…   

An HIV/Aids victim who has weathered the storm managing to somehow prolong his life should not try to play the old [stigmatization] lyrics again and yet again: the house you built out of it should be enough; the cars you bought out of it should be enough – jumping here and there is sometimes good politics - but there are certain old songs that might trigger stray thinking back to days gone-by that many might no-longer want to revisit. What stigmatization did for you then… should not be what you pursue now – compose a new song and create a change of heart and mind; a quarrel on phone between a [father and his son] should not be your early morning TV breakfast material… why not retire and write a book about how you survived the pre TASO much hurting period – instead of getting in-between a man and his son! 

The early day HIV victims – and the stigma               

It is not the purpose of this blog article to name anyone… for the benefit of refreshing memory and in solidarity with the living sufferers – in a small way I want to observe here that the early victims mostly died away quietly actually guilt-ridden; they were the ones who never benefitted from the subsequent phenomena of “Counseling” which came much too late for many! Counseling effectively began after the good women of TASO had established their organization – in time to save those who were infected much later. By then the tough-hearted who also publicly accepted that they were the earliest… to be infected with HIV/Aids had survived the first generation victims – who hopelessly died enmasse.

Those tough-hearted mostly survived through quest for knowledge and ceaseless reading and formulating of survival kits of their own: like regular vitamin and nutrition intake to enhance their resistance and eventually stayed the demise-point. Till TASO came to the rescue - It is only the lucky few who merited there otherwise in Uganda even the highly educated succumbed – despite their abundant knowledge and even money! The early day victim who was lucky enough to have had money and basic survival skills and is still alive today – is a great person. ***

Writer is an Independent Thinker, blogger and book Author    

On [On posh white blokes in NGOs]

On [On posh white blokes in NGOs]

           ‘Our Kingdom - Power and Liberty in Britain’

Sam Mwaka-karama

An article published on a British website; ‘Our Kingdom - Power and Liberty in Britain’ – caught my attention yesterday 16^th Oct 2013: Subject; Race, Development, NGOs, Gender, UK… [Guppi Bola’s] story is blue eyed in a subtle kind of way; however it seems the hazel eyed original writer of the title above [Peter Buffet], and someone else Ben; [Guppi’s boss] may have triggered the ultimate controversy. Reading Guppi, as the black [under dog] man I am; I want to appreciate Buffet’s metaphorical ‘I am full, here please’ – like at the dinner table – the old English country gentleman would most likely do that and, walk away calmly to the smoking room, as it were.

    The issue at hand in Guppi’s discussion [of Ben’s response to Peter’s Guardian article – and protractedly New York Times earlier?] opens a direct debate topic and, dramatically; “The world of development NGOs is full of white men from well off backgrounds. One of them wrote about how this is a problem in the Guardian last week, and here, one of their employees responds, looking at who speaks about these things and how; who is heard, and what should be done about it?”

    Certainly to me I think what should be done about it is encourage the ‘Posh white blokes’ to accept that the Africans [am Ugandan] are getting well educated enough to run those NGOs. This is a recognition the [model] or posh white blokes need to share with the [model] or posh black blokes. It might not be the matter of vacating the seat for the new-comer at the club dinner table as such – but perhaps creating a squeeze-in slot.

    To me, the problem here might however be the ‘well off background’ factor. I think all these posh white blokes are being done favors massively by that ‘well off background’- now don’t read me wrong here; I think charity management is a delegation of responsibility. And I believe the Philanthropists or funds contributor charity groups might want to know who runs the overseas NGO office – what merits might they [as unknown Africans have] to fit in as a team of ‘posh black blokes’ taking-over from ‘posh white blokes’. How would the blacks perform anyway? I see and seem to hear these sort of subtle debates at the boardrooms there at the ‘background’ and, my brother Africans might not be up to it by my knowing – I do not want to sound like one trying to dismiss the status quo in total favor of the white blokes – because surely management of ‘development NGOs in the social justices’ field need change as well.

    The murkier end of the debate is the shroud! That that dirty old cloth that always covered-up white minds on certain issues pertaining to black peoples – as Guppi Bola observes; “It strikes me that it takes someone who looks like you to encourage a response to a problem that marginalized people have been talking about for many-many years. In understanding what's needed for a free and fair world, maybe my boss would have noticed the hundreds of other articles, emails and conversations that spoke of oppression, privilege, diversity and respect way before Buffet scored an article in the New York Times”.

    And that brings me to my own point of entry in registering this comment; Guppi slots-in another writer who had for several years been airing this same views; “Take Teju Cole for example, who tweeted a series of phrases about the “White savior industrial complex” after the Kony débâcle more than a year earlier. Cole, an effusive novelist and passionate equal rights campaigner, speaks vividly about the role of the white male in many different movements. His article only made it to The Atlantic, but its relevance is no less significant.

The inference to ‘[Joseph] Kony 2012’ stark débâcle of the Jason documentary – which to me points out yet another point in the sometimes fumble-some affairs of selfless greed in the world of the development NGOs – is fact that the old boy ‘posh white male’ syndicated by that powerful Philanthropic ‘background’ as catapulted into the African open field, also developed a hidden [personal] agenda. Now this new situation is the one that makes some considerations valid; for instance how the voice of the oppressed actually triggered the precarious set-up [in the Kony affair] to finally ‘stark debacle’. But certainly even the Kony documentary had its merits – I mean, what is the point; a man makes a plan and implements it meticulously to success is merits! If he was white or if he was black is not the issue. The problem is one way or the other whatever one does [from within the development NGOs] will eventually involve both black and white people anyway so, how do you debate powerful ‘posh white males’ dominating the development NGOs and jump to the conclusions that carry racist under-tone – fine they are advocates of equal rights; the issue is that the development NGOs field is charity driven and, if a ‘posh white bloke’ wanted to maintain his personal ‘posh-ness’ then he founds his own money maker and not ‘posh-it’ in the field that has so much to do with not very posh black people. Your merits are yours personally and, if you use it there and not in public domains of charity – your achievements will still advance communities of the world one way or the other be you white or black. I think ‘posh white blokes’ should found their own ‘Virgins’ and get out of development NGOs. $$$ 

         Writer is an Independent Thinker, Blogger and Book Author.   

The Fatherhood Ransom

The Fatherhood ransom: the Diasporas prodigal sons and the ‘tithe’…

Sam Mwaka-karama

God actually gave away fatherhood to mankind: ‘multiply and fill the earth…’launching human procreation; so that when you call God “Father” while you shun your biological ‘father’ then you are ignorant and even a little bit backward! Unwise and irrelevant.

You are absolutely free and, your independence is guaranteed as long as you respect and absolutely show total loyalty to your biological father. God is represented in your life by your father – and it is only through him that you get that blessing to play your role in procreation… no matter how much you pray through Jesus Christ or even directly to God - as long as you hate or disrespect or shun your biological father; you are still the “Prodigal son… in the diasporas” who will [one day] come back home barehanded and need help and sympathy of the father; and get do what you should have done [in the first place much earlier] to buy your own passage into procreation by affording the blessing of your father; by working that ‘tithe’ peacefully at home. Or sending back home that ‘tithe’ 10% of your income regularly. So when things finally grind to a halt… that signifies your home-coming.

Like it or not; you are bound to your biological father by the simple linkage for procreation, the one thing that Jesus will not dispense – the one thing for which mankind labors is that in the process of development, procreation disseminates itself and the son is always tied-up to his father by that ‘tithe’ till productivity.

Churchmen say that to gain blessings from the God of creation from whom all things is said to process… you have to tie a ‘tithe’ in your offering to God – through the Church regularly – then your path in life is made smoother.

But then in the story of ‘Yakobo’ and ‘Rebecca’ and their two sons; we learn that – there still exist a cache of the ‘Fatherhood ransom’ a son owes his biological father; we learn that without paying this ransom to your biological father in your [youth] and or working life, you may at some point realize that you didn’t have your-own kids because you did not labor for your father, nor did you regularly tie a ‘tithe’ [the mandatory 10%] for your biological father – even though you regularly tied a ‘tithe’ in church, prayed regularly, loved a spouse and gave-out alms to the less fortunate; still [a void of emptiness might still vacuum itself deep inside you] occasioned by that wanting “Fatherhood Ransom” – a serious and formidable challenge to your manhood. A confusing entanglement to your mind and personal psychology – and an opening for doubt and sneer by the proudia big-headed lucky class, who are always there to prod and bruise your wounded feeling and self doubt, till you become an all round phobic… and perhaps make a dash right into the ‘chasing of the wind’ evangelical and gospel churches to be ‘born again’. Not only that; the story of “Laban” and the Guy who labored for his Uncle for seven plus seven years for the hand of his daughter; these are biblical tales that perhaps mildly indicate to us that ‘procreation’ is not a free ride… [you don’t just find somebody’s daughter on a silver plate and produce your own kids because you respected your own good father and, at the same time you insult the father of that girl mothering for you kids]… you either labor for it or you buy it from her biological father by giving respect and support to the aging man who fathered and placed her on that silver plate for you to luckily access… otherwise there is misery ahead waiting for you, or you might die early, or you might bury all those kids, or their mother might die.  

But many [including I] have discovered the [hard] way that the ‘Fatherhood ransom’ is the key to procreation and [therefore] longer enjoyment of functioning and working marriage or spoucing life. Certain traditional characteristics often vices parenting especially here in Africa – blown by the winds spewed by the demons of the larger turmoil over-loaded spiritualities and principalities that are permanently in anarchy and, whose superior wars constantly affect life here on earth.

Procreation is direct from the Creator to Adam and Eve – shouting ‘praise the lord’ or ‘God is great’ won’t help you there; for you to produce a child of your own, you must respect and stay loyal to your biological father by regular support… fine, for argument’s sake; a son could leave home go away at a tender age, finds a woman even bear children – here he might have found also a [proxy of his father] from whom he found the passage to procreation and, as long as he treats that substitute with respect without shunning his biological father, the boy finds passage into procreation as long as he engages into strenuous physical workout – like the Guy in the Laban story - in the modern day you might have to become a sportsman, hard-laborer, or throw your life away into the army [and work honestly] to gain your life and win into procreation.

In our disorganized African mentality it is this factor that disarray Africans; we are the less organized world. We are the more difficult to organize. We Africans have all the properties and materials of and for chaotic manipulatable existence… a child growing-up in this ‘helter-skelter’ develops more than enough ingredients that feed parental hate and disregard – where a son might [someday] work, say far away from home and, never look back; ignorant of all these [saving] factors, he floats and get carried away by the winds: He ties no ‘tithe’ to his father [he might of cause tie his ‘tithe’ in church and give alms – therefore even make money] which he loses fast as it comes - and as the gap widen the son becomes prodigal – shuns home and disregards his father – but then the dimaconian  ‘Fatherhood ransom’ is poised over the back of his neck; for either you respect and support [biological] fatherhood by the ‘tithe’ 10%, that you also become a father and further the process of procreation - or you play the prodigal son to the hilt and lose your head. The dimaconian wreath will eventually come-down. This is not addressed to any particular person. $$$$

Writer is an Independent Thinker, Blogger and Book Author

    

Hidden Arrogance: preaching proudly and cynically is not a virtue

Sam Mwaka-karama

Hypocrisy – is not the virtue: Some men who are favored by their fellow men, to appear on TV, seem to imagine they had the full right, to stand there and sarcastically tell viewers rubbish; in the name of Jesus Christ – that is ‘hidden Arrogance’ and, will never be a virtue.

If you are there to tell viewers how they must “humble” themselves “because nobody wants to live with an arrogant person” and, you want to tell them TV audience that; they, the targets of this your clearly hypocrite-arrogance talk and sort of demeanor… this your preaching advise [and invocations] might be falling on deaf ears – Here on Earth and in Heaven.

Jesus did not teach anybody to [“humble yourself - because nobody wants to live with an arrogant person”] – Jesus said [“…unless you become like these little children…”] – that is what humbleness is to Christ – please better not to say anything at all… better not to even pray in public at all - than try to do something without a vocation; because the sins of your false preaching might become worst than that of the man who does not pray at all…

The mushrooming of preaching in this age and times is the opportune convenience of the Hi-tech and ICT; net and web and the internet that brought Televangelism closer to all of us here in Africa as well… this does not mean that the Holy Spirit is calling on everybody to evangelize – copy-cats are not inspired - please evangelism is and must remain “Virtual”: addressed to mankind and not to one particular person.

 I think it better to discuss the relationship between Man and God… this discussion has been going on for thousands of years and every created human being is entitle to discussing that in whatever personal or public way – but it might not be in righteousness to preach outside the restricted scope of philosophy and theology there you might need a ‘vocation’; to interpret the word of God you need God’s own calling… but to discuss God, Creation and Salvation you don’t need a vocation; the process of discerning history is a natural thinking process.     

What you might not be conscious of as a prospective [or learning] preacher is fact that they [TV watchers] might actually be [less] myopic than you imagine in this your clearly misguided preaching… TV watchers are not blind-bats and idiots who might not recognize your behavioral ‘hidden arrogance’ – in fact on TV your behavior and your words may conflict – your inspired preaching and not so inspired preaching and personally crafted nonsense are all visible between your words and your behavior; what they call body language - so that your message carry negative connotations covered by your silly invocation of the name of Jesus Christ; actually in vain!

Because you very shallowly think that whenever you [utter] the name of Jesus – people automatically come-down and absolutely believe and ‘respect’ your [every] word - rubbish. Faith did not begin with you and also evidently you miss-out on psychology: firstly your own intended [hidden message] is showing and very much visible and clearly heard and seen. Secondly you don’t even know when or where Christ talked about [humbleness] which you should quote… and, on two occasions I have watched you – you did not make that quote. That is why I have addressed this blog to you… YOU!

Your lucky strike was evidently appearing on TV regularly; since you are actually a youth who is initially inexperienced in life but was lucky enough to be offered a slot to say whatever you want on national TV.

But then before you can tell us all how ‘arrogant and stupid’ we are – you should better preview yourself, check your own body language and hear your own voice [on TV] and what you are actually not saying and listen and see what you are actually saying: you have been sending a secret message! And I should have sent you a rude sms – stop invoking Jesus Christ in your deceitful, arrogant, self important, hidden messages targeted at an individual [one you clearly had in mind] – that is vain preaching.   

My role in the [VeryMuchSo] documentary you are [indirectly] pitting yourself against me for, was well acted, well spoken and professionally done [over six years ago]. I conveyed what was wanted, in the appropriate calm manner, professionally giving the right and accurate picture the project was planned for… you want to use Jesus name to justify the jealousy you feel over that? It is you who is being arrogant, deceitful, disrespectful and stupidly envious – I have already lost every opportunity to get money I deserve out of that feature documentary I honestly participated in – what else would you want to take away from me there? [Where were you when I was involved in the making of it? Where were you when I was with the Olympic athletes?] 

You should actually realize that you might be breaking one of God’s laws: [Thou shall not utter the name of the Lord Thy God in vain] – because you are using the name of Jesus Christ in coverage of matters meant to convey your own hidden personal messages to [one target TV audience] in a hidden way - that is hypocrisy and terrible arrogance when exhibited on national TV by some silly amateur who should keep his [personal] issues to himself. The documentary is long since made – what will calling me ‘arrogant’ help you with – isn’t it enough that clearly the documentary [especially my role in it] inspired you into getting on TV?

If you finally got [the] camera from the [whosoever] and, you are recording yourself in your home [studio] or office – you don’t need to have me as your perennial subject of discussion and presentation and also audience anymore; the whole world, the entire Globalization is out there to attract your camera and broadcasting attention; now go do your own [VeryMuchSo]… go do your own Olympian documentary. Go do your own water project… Now go build your own family wealth – if my family is down because of my arrogance… don’t make it your bread and butter, milk and honey and mandazi.

Don’t rub it in too hard onto the name and blood of Jesus Christ. Watch out! You might be over invoking Jesus; he never talked of [arrogance] he only advised on humility; humbling oneself “like these little children” – please leave [VeryMuchSo] it was not my initiative or my business I was only a participant. If you were hurt by my participation… there is nothing you can change there. It was an objective relevant professionally done part of research and recording of an element of humanity and history – your hurt and jealousy is not. You are free to cut-off everything and interfere with the little peace in my dwelling and in my interactivity with others. What I have lost in life is bigger and it has all stopped hurting me. I am beyond caring. Your hurt and the purpose of your preaching will never touch me. ***